International Master Gardener Conference 2011

Top Ten Reasons to be a Master Gardener

Compiled by Jessica Walliser –
Horticulturalist and KDKA Radio Host
Sewickley, Pennsylvania

  • 10. Because dirty hands make for smart minds.
  • 9. Because if you are a single man, the male to female ratio is totally in your favor.
  • 8. Because, admit it, you always wanted to know the growth input ratio of a Chamaecyparus picifera ‘filifera aurea nana’ as compared to a metasequoia glyptostroboides ‘ogon’.
  • 7. Because someday you just knew you had to find out whether a tomato is really a fruit or vegetable.
  • 6. Because you have an affinity for both horses***t and, more importantly, bulls***t.
  • 5. Because the food at the meetings is soooo much better than at the PTA, the FDA, the FFA, the GCA, the GWA, and the AARP.
  • 4. Because you take distinct pleasure in going to the local garden center and knowing more than that young punk who works there.
  • 3. Because poison ivy doesn’t really itch that much.
  • 2. Because it may be the only time in your life when you have the opportunity to man a 1-800 hotline.
  • And the number one reason why you have become a Master Gardener: Because you have always wanted to help save the world.